Yeah, I really can't keep apologizing for slacking on the posting....sorry, it just happens. Honestly, lately's been a pretty down time in our household. Ben's dad passed this time of year, just two years ago, so he's been feeling pretty bad. Add that to all the wonderful news in the world these days, and it's enough to make us not want to get out of bed. But that's no way to live life, and now we've got a kid to set a good example for. I've been known to get into funks and pretty much make it to work and home, and remain incommunicado for a while til I shake myself out of it. Not really an option anymore. It's a good thing, how depressed can you really get when you get up in the morning, look in the crib, and your adorable kid is totally delighted to see you, and you don't find out for a few minutes that his look of joy may have been the result of unleashing a mountain of crap, and not necessarily seeing your face?
Whatever, I'll take my smiles where I can get them.
It's something I think about, though-how he's going to see me and how that's going to form the kind of person he turns into. There were times when I wondered about my parents and the choices they made, but whatever happened, they always just pushed forward. Wallowing's not really allowed in my house. And I want Henry to see the same thing, because there's going to be plenty of times in his life when I'm sure he's going to want to say "Fuck it." and not go to work or deal with anything. Sometimes it's easier to drink a few beers and watch Ghost Hunters marathons. I maintain that, much like most other things, this sort of behavior is acceptable in moderation. Very careful moderation.
Update on the Lent progress-have remained alcohol free fairly easily. When a kid's going to wake you up at six without giving the slightest bit of consideration to when YOU went to bed, it's best to turn in early and forgo your ingrained nighttime traditions (Kids are such selfish jerks!)
The coffee ban met with massive fail, very early on. I tried, I really did. But after a two-week long headache and seriously contemplating chucking office supplies at undergrad dental students, I decided it was in everyone's best interest for me to have my morning cup. Down to one, and no soda or anything like that. Watching the diet, and got my bloodwork today-hopefully my cholesterol will come back as "on the high side of normal" and not "your heart is going to explode" this year.
And in the last bit of recent news, the 10k I signed up for is in a week! Snuck up on me. I think I'll finish, which is my only real goal at this point. I don't even think you can call my long run pace running, or jogging. More like slogging. But hey, my pants are getting looser. So win.
Henry's going crazy with the crawling. We did not realize how woefully unprepared we were to have a mobile child. What is it that makes a kid ignore his toys and head immediately towards anything that has the potential to hurt them? If anyone wanted to make a serious argument against evolution (and here in Virginia, there's plenty of people who do) that might be a good place to start. Self-preservation is definitely a skill learned later in life. Or in Ben's case, never. If you could see his ER visit history, you'd know why I worry about that gene being passed on to our kid. God help us when he starts walking.
Friday, March 25, 2011
Monday, March 14, 2011
Does this smell like barf to you?
Got to get more consistent about this posting thing. I'm working on it. We've just had a rough few months, with Henry being sick and family drama. He seemed to be doing better this weekend, but last night I went in to check on him and he and his crib were just hosed with puke. I mean, it was bad. Naturally I panicked, but was calmed down by a helpful friend who also happens to be a nurse. Nurses are good people to know. They generally give you the information you need in a way that says "Stop freaking the hell out. Kids puke and have fevers. It's fine." without making you feel stupid about it.
Somehow a sick kid puts you and your partner into sync, though. It's definitely a team effort-one goes with the kid to the tub, one goes with everything in barf range to the washer. (Don't mix those up, by the way). While Henry was miserable while he was barfing, as we all are, afterwards he would look around, smile at me, and clap. Clearly he can puke and rally. He's not going to have ANY issues at college!
Other than that we've had work, I've had school, friends visiting, it's been a busy few weeks. I also gave up alcohol and coffee for Lent, which has been....interesting. I'm not particularly religious and am definitely not Catholic anymore, so I think a lot of people think it's odd that I give up anything at all. I just think that even if you don't believe in the exact theology behind it, Lent provides a good framework for doing some good internally, or in your community. Since I have no money or time to donate anywhere, I decided to focus on some things I could improve on. And really, if you're not taking care of yourself, how can you put more of yourself out there? I like that it coincides with spring, too. Sort of a renewal thing (not trying to sound all nature worshippy or anything, I promise, no naked dancing in the full moon in my backyard. Just the front yard.)
Alcohol was kind of a no-brainer, having a beer or glass of wine (or two...or three, if we're being honest) had gotten to be a bit too much of a habit for me, so I decided that could go. Saves me money, too. The coffee was trickier. Lots of people with small children eyed me suspiciously (and blearily) and asked me why the hell I would give up coffee when I have a small child and work. The headache I've had for a few days would also like an answer to that question. It hurts to think, but basically the root of that one is that I realized I don't really like coffee all that much, but I drink it every day because I've become dependent on it, and I don't like that. Honestly, of the two, that's been the harder habit to kick. Good thing it's spring break and the undergrads are gone. If some 18 year old walked into my office, and asked me a question without knocking or saying "Excuse me" or even bothering to stop texting, I'm not sure Coffee-Free Megan could really be held responsible for her actions.
"Wait, why did you get fired?"
"Well, there was this kid...and I had this stapler....paramedics had to be involved....you know, I don't really want to talk about it."
Wish me luck.
Somehow a sick kid puts you and your partner into sync, though. It's definitely a team effort-one goes with the kid to the tub, one goes with everything in barf range to the washer. (Don't mix those up, by the way). While Henry was miserable while he was barfing, as we all are, afterwards he would look around, smile at me, and clap. Clearly he can puke and rally. He's not going to have ANY issues at college!
Other than that we've had work, I've had school, friends visiting, it's been a busy few weeks. I also gave up alcohol and coffee for Lent, which has been....interesting. I'm not particularly religious and am definitely not Catholic anymore, so I think a lot of people think it's odd that I give up anything at all. I just think that even if you don't believe in the exact theology behind it, Lent provides a good framework for doing some good internally, or in your community. Since I have no money or time to donate anywhere, I decided to focus on some things I could improve on. And really, if you're not taking care of yourself, how can you put more of yourself out there? I like that it coincides with spring, too. Sort of a renewal thing (not trying to sound all nature worshippy or anything, I promise, no naked dancing in the full moon in my backyard. Just the front yard.)
Alcohol was kind of a no-brainer, having a beer or glass of wine (or two...or three, if we're being honest) had gotten to be a bit too much of a habit for me, so I decided that could go. Saves me money, too. The coffee was trickier. Lots of people with small children eyed me suspiciously (and blearily) and asked me why the hell I would give up coffee when I have a small child and work. The headache I've had for a few days would also like an answer to that question. It hurts to think, but basically the root of that one is that I realized I don't really like coffee all that much, but I drink it every day because I've become dependent on it, and I don't like that. Honestly, of the two, that's been the harder habit to kick. Good thing it's spring break and the undergrads are gone. If some 18 year old walked into my office, and asked me a question without knocking or saying "Excuse me" or even bothering to stop texting, I'm not sure Coffee-Free Megan could really be held responsible for her actions.
"Wait, why did you get fired?"
"Well, there was this kid...and I had this stapler....paramedics had to be involved....you know, I don't really want to talk about it."
Wish me luck.
Monday, March 7, 2011
Hopefully, this link works! Help raise funds for MS research!
http://main.nationalmssociety.org/site/TR/Walk/VABWalkEvents?px=6022093&pg=personal&fr_id=16743
Apologies, I am technologically slow. Thank you to those who have donated already! New blog to come soon, once I get somewhat caught up, got some huge work and school projects, and a kid with a double ear infection.
Yes, you CAN do it all, if you don't mind not sleeping and never being totally caught up on anything!
Apologies, I am technologically slow. Thank you to those who have donated already! New blog to come soon, once I get somewhat caught up, got some huge work and school projects, and a kid with a double ear infection.
Yes, you CAN do it all, if you don't mind not sleeping and never being totally caught up on anything!
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Gimme some money, and I'll dress like a Viking.
So the time of year has come for me to engage in some fundraising. Back when I was an impressionable college student, I met an awesome girl named Skate, and her equally awesome boyfriend Rob. I met them through a guy I was dating, and even when that hit the bricks (for about the eleventh time) they stayed friends with me. They took me to my first Foxfield event, took me out for my 21st birthday, and took me in when my engagement hit the rocks a few years later. (Their spare bedroom has been occupied by more than one jilted fiance, thus earning it the title "The Non-Honeymoon Suite".
They're just all-around great people, and very, very fun. Some of my favorite Skatisms involve:
Her breaking a table at my 2001 New Year's Eve party. I'm not even sure how that came about, but it involved some dance moves, and from what I understand, was intentional.
Her meeting some guys from New Jersey outside of a bar and insisting that they come hang out at her house because her then-boyfriend, now-husband Rob was also from New Jersey. (He did not go along with this plan, surprisingly).
Her falling down at my bachelorette party, but to be fair, we all did at one point or another.
I'm sure I'll remember more.
Skate also has MS. And every year, for all she's done for me, I repay her a little bit by raising money for the Charlottesville MS Walk. I also offer up some motivation by thinking of ways to embarrass myself to get people to donate more money. Last year I promised to do the walk dressed as a bee if I got to the $1000 mark. I did, and I did do the walk in my bee suit-seven months pregnant, at that.
This year, if we get to $15,000, all the walkers will be dressing as vikings, and Henry's going as a dragon. So do some good, and I'll post pictures if we meet our goal.
http://main.nationalmssociety.org/site/TRC/Walk/VABWalkEvents?pg=peditor&fr_id=16743&px=6022093
They're just all-around great people, and very, very fun. Some of my favorite Skatisms involve:
Her breaking a table at my 2001 New Year's Eve party. I'm not even sure how that came about, but it involved some dance moves, and from what I understand, was intentional.
Her meeting some guys from New Jersey outside of a bar and insisting that they come hang out at her house because her then-boyfriend, now-husband Rob was also from New Jersey. (He did not go along with this plan, surprisingly).
Her falling down at my bachelorette party, but to be fair, we all did at one point or another.
I'm sure I'll remember more.
Skate also has MS. And every year, for all she's done for me, I repay her a little bit by raising money for the Charlottesville MS Walk. I also offer up some motivation by thinking of ways to embarrass myself to get people to donate more money. Last year I promised to do the walk dressed as a bee if I got to the $1000 mark. I did, and I did do the walk in my bee suit-seven months pregnant, at that.
This year, if we get to $15,000, all the walkers will be dressing as vikings, and Henry's going as a dragon. So do some good, and I'll post pictures if we meet our goal.
http://main.nationalmssociety.org/site/TRC/Walk/VABWalkEvents?pg=peditor&fr_id=16743&px=6022093
Monday, February 21, 2011
Sleep Talking
Was just reading one of my favorite blogs, about Sleep Talking Man, and it reminded me that people have asked me to post some of Ben's sleep talking. This started about six years ago, after we'd moved in together. The thing is, Ben sleep talks, but it can be hard to tell if he's awake or asleep until something really odd comes out.
****WARNING. THIS POST HAS WORDS AND SUCH THAT ARE....WELL, THERE ARE FREQUENT MENTIONS OF BALLS. SO IF YOU'RE OFFENDED BY SUCH OR ONE OF MY SIBLINGS OR GOD FORBID MY MOTHER, YOU MAY NOT WANT TO READ THIS.****
Ok. So one of the main ways I can tell if Ben is sleep talking is that he brings up his balls, but it didn't start out that way. One of the first times I can remember was when we were engaged, and getting tons of gifts packed in lots of styrofoam. One night I wake up to Ben mumbling, and this conversation follows.
Me: What?
Ben: I said I'm going to go BUCK WILD and SET THINGS OFF.
Me: What?
Him: You heard me! Now eat this styrofoam!
Me What the hell is wrong with you?
He makes a Homer Simpson-esque fist and says: Eat it.
Other notables.
One night I woke up and he was snoring. I asked him to roll over because he was snoring.
He replied. "How about I just shit on your FACE?" and then proceeded to go THHHHBBBBBPPPPPPTTT for a good minute.
I said "Man, what a lucky girl I am."
He sat up, pointed at me, and said "Believe it, lady."
The last one, one of the latest ones, came about when he fell asleep on our chair in the living room, in what looked like a very uncomfortable position. The following happened.
Me: Why don't you go to bed?
Him: *Muttering*
Me: Honey, you're falling asleep. Go to bed.
Him: Why don't you lick my balls?
Me: Ummm....no thanks. Go to bed, you're asleep.
Him: You know SOMETHING about EVERYTHING, but you don't know NOTHING about BALL WASHING.
He then appeared to go back to sleep, but five minutes later sat straight up, pointed at me and said. "This is bullshit. ALL OF IT." Then collapsed back into sleep.
It's an adventure, what can I say? I'll post more as they happen/I remember them.
****WARNING. THIS POST HAS WORDS AND SUCH THAT ARE....WELL, THERE ARE FREQUENT MENTIONS OF BALLS. SO IF YOU'RE OFFENDED BY SUCH OR ONE OF MY SIBLINGS OR GOD FORBID MY MOTHER, YOU MAY NOT WANT TO READ THIS.****
Ok. So one of the main ways I can tell if Ben is sleep talking is that he brings up his balls, but it didn't start out that way. One of the first times I can remember was when we were engaged, and getting tons of gifts packed in lots of styrofoam. One night I wake up to Ben mumbling, and this conversation follows.
Me: What?
Ben: I said I'm going to go BUCK WILD and SET THINGS OFF.
Me: What?
Him: You heard me! Now eat this styrofoam!
Me What the hell is wrong with you?
He makes a Homer Simpson-esque fist and says: Eat it.
Other notables.
One night I woke up and he was snoring. I asked him to roll over because he was snoring.
He replied. "How about I just shit on your FACE?" and then proceeded to go THHHHBBBBBPPPPPPTTT for a good minute.
I said "Man, what a lucky girl I am."
He sat up, pointed at me, and said "Believe it, lady."
The last one, one of the latest ones, came about when he fell asleep on our chair in the living room, in what looked like a very uncomfortable position. The following happened.
Me: Why don't you go to bed?
Him: *Muttering*
Me: Honey, you're falling asleep. Go to bed.
Him: Why don't you lick my balls?
Me: Ummm....no thanks. Go to bed, you're asleep.
Him: You know SOMETHING about EVERYTHING, but you don't know NOTHING about BALL WASHING.
He then appeared to go back to sleep, but five minutes later sat straight up, pointed at me and said. "This is bullshit. ALL OF IT." Then collapsed back into sleep.
It's an adventure, what can I say? I'll post more as they happen/I remember them.
And we're mobile. To cough on more things.
Sitting at the computer, listening to a sick little guy cough and fuss himself to sleep. Yes, big Hank is sick AGAIN. He literally just finished a round of antibiotics Saturday, and by Saturday night was starting to cough. Got up this morning, got ready for work, and went to wake him up only to find him burning up and runny-nosed. Ben and I split the day-he went to work in the morning, and headed home at eleven so we could swap. The kid had been so crabby that I was happy to trade him, I'm sad to say. Not his fault, he's just feeling miserable, but man, when you're reduced to dancing and singing along to Fraggle Rock to amuse your child...well, those are desperate times. Any longer and I probably would have let him play with all the things he tries so desperately to get to-namely all the remotes, the phone, and anything I happen to be holding.
But we did have a breakthough in the milestone department, our little guy is now mobile. I hesitate to say he's crawling, he's more....lurching. In a crablike sideways inchworm way. It's pretty amazing to see. It's funny how all these firsts are so amazing to us, but seeing your kid smile, or laugh, or taste something good for the first time just reminds you of how many simple joys there are in life. Today we spent a good hour watching him figure out that he could work his way over to his toys, and saw him sit and contemplate how to get the toys that were on top of the ottoman, just out of his reach. Wish I had some of his drive.
I also took him to see my family on Saturday. Sunday was my mom's birthday, so Casey, my youngest brother, and I decided to drive down and surprise her. I doubt we did surprise her, because nothing ever does, but she was happy to see us. Henry got fed his first Thin Mint and was otherwise spoiled rotten by everyone-I was glad I was there because my sister threatened to give him coffee. She said I'd done the same for her kids, but I had to point out that I never gave them coffee-just criminal amounts of sugar. But I won't say too much about her, because she says I'm mean on here about her and mom, and told my mom I talk about her online. Mom threatened to get a facebook page to see all the things we say about her, but she never will, she doesn't have the patience.
Shan says I should start a "Shit My Mom Says" blog. She has had some winners. We were laughing this weekend about her taking me to college with my dad. My mom is not the most emotional of people, but you see that a lot with Irish Catholic families. Yeah, they love you, and you love them, but no need to talk about it. As my friend Skate, who comes from a similar background, once told me, "Emotions are for Italians."
So my mom is taking me to college, and as she and Dad turn to go, she faces me, and takes my hands, and takes a deep breath. I think "Wow, this is it. She's going to tell me she's proud of me. MAYBE SHE'LL EVEN CRY."
She squeezed my hands and says, "Megan. Remember. If you get drunk, pass out on your stomach. Because otherwise you might choke on your own vomit. And that's a horrible way to go." And then she just left.
But that advice has stuck with me, so maybe she knew what she was doing.
But we did have a breakthough in the milestone department, our little guy is now mobile. I hesitate to say he's crawling, he's more....lurching. In a crablike sideways inchworm way. It's pretty amazing to see. It's funny how all these firsts are so amazing to us, but seeing your kid smile, or laugh, or taste something good for the first time just reminds you of how many simple joys there are in life. Today we spent a good hour watching him figure out that he could work his way over to his toys, and saw him sit and contemplate how to get the toys that were on top of the ottoman, just out of his reach. Wish I had some of his drive.
I also took him to see my family on Saturday. Sunday was my mom's birthday, so Casey, my youngest brother, and I decided to drive down and surprise her. I doubt we did surprise her, because nothing ever does, but she was happy to see us. Henry got fed his first Thin Mint and was otherwise spoiled rotten by everyone-I was glad I was there because my sister threatened to give him coffee. She said I'd done the same for her kids, but I had to point out that I never gave them coffee-just criminal amounts of sugar. But I won't say too much about her, because she says I'm mean on here about her and mom, and told my mom I talk about her online. Mom threatened to get a facebook page to see all the things we say about her, but she never will, she doesn't have the patience.
Shan says I should start a "Shit My Mom Says" blog. She has had some winners. We were laughing this weekend about her taking me to college with my dad. My mom is not the most emotional of people, but you see that a lot with Irish Catholic families. Yeah, they love you, and you love them, but no need to talk about it. As my friend Skate, who comes from a similar background, once told me, "Emotions are for Italians."
So my mom is taking me to college, and as she and Dad turn to go, she faces me, and takes my hands, and takes a deep breath. I think "Wow, this is it. She's going to tell me she's proud of me. MAYBE SHE'LL EVEN CRY."
She squeezed my hands and says, "Megan. Remember. If you get drunk, pass out on your stomach. Because otherwise you might choke on your own vomit. And that's a horrible way to go." And then she just left.
But that advice has stuck with me, so maybe she knew what she was doing.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Valentine's Day
I'm not so into Valentine's Day. And I don't say that in the "oh, I'm trying to be blase about it, but GOD HELP YOU IF YOU DON'T COME THROUGH WITH A PRESENT" way. I just don't really dig it. Ben and I, while very in love and very happy together, are not terribly romantic people. The one time we did try to have a romantic Valentine's Day, it went badly. He grabbed me and kissed me when I wasn't expecting it, and I accidentally jabbed him in the eye really hard. Later on, I was giving him a massage, and he farted on me. (Whenever I bring this up, he insists that "you shifted your weight. I couldn't help it.")
So yeah, we generally give each other a small gift or two and he makes me chili. And let me tell you, nothing gets you geared up for a night of romantic love like a stomach full of chili. Hot.
This year I did manage to surprise him by finding a brand of hot sauce he had once in a restaurant and really liked. Found it on amazon, the most wonderful place in the world for people who hate shopping. He brought me roses today. Tomorrow's my day off, and I get to take Henry to the wang doctor (ok, so the technical term is urologist. Whatever. Wang doctor.) One of his guys hasn't dropped yet. I'm sure he'll be in a stellar mood after being prodded in the junk.
I did start thinking about relationships on my run today. I took my Ipod, which I generally don't do, I like the quiet and random thoughts that pop into my head when I'm out on the road. But today I had to do 30 straight minutes and that hasn't happened since before I got pregnant, so I figured I needed a distraction. There's always a band you associate with certain people, and my ipod went to Death Cab for Cutie. Not a band I'm crazy about anymore, but it reminded me of the guy I dated before I met Ben. It was a fairly overdramatic relationship, but he's a good guy, and he got me out of a very deep rut that I'd dug for myself. Even though things didn't work out, he got me to think about what I wanted out of my life. I think up to that point I'd been bending over backwards to fit into other people's lives. Yeah, it ended badly, but we're sort of friends now. Again, still not a big Death Cab fan.
But before I get angry emails, I'm not saying they're terrible. I'm just saying that if you're sitting in the dark, listening to Transatlanticism over and over again because you feel like it's applicable to you, then it's time to evaluate your life and look at other options. Same goes for Tori Amos or Morrissey.
After that Drive-by Truckers came on, and it made me smile because that's a band that is forever linked to Ben for me. And I thought about how lucky I was that my life, and the people in it, had led me here. I once read a short story where the main character says something to the effect of "You could spend your life in abject terror, thinking of all the things that might not have happened." So when I think of that particular ex (who I'd rather call my friend than my ex at this point) I'm glad for the experience, because it helped me see what was important to me. And I know he's doing what he wants, where he wants to be, and I hope he's happy. It's an amazing thing, gaining some perspective.
Now all my other exes, including the one who passed out in the middle of a Subway robbery and the one who inserted himself into movie plots and then pretended those things really happened to HIM....yeah, I don't really care where the hell they ended up.
I will say that I thank whatever's out there, deity-wise, that my life went the way it did, because it got me to Ben, and eventually, to my beautiful son. I love you guys more than anything. Happy Valentine's Day.
So yeah, we generally give each other a small gift or two and he makes me chili. And let me tell you, nothing gets you geared up for a night of romantic love like a stomach full of chili. Hot.
This year I did manage to surprise him by finding a brand of hot sauce he had once in a restaurant and really liked. Found it on amazon, the most wonderful place in the world for people who hate shopping. He brought me roses today. Tomorrow's my day off, and I get to take Henry to the wang doctor (ok, so the technical term is urologist. Whatever. Wang doctor.) One of his guys hasn't dropped yet. I'm sure he'll be in a stellar mood after being prodded in the junk.
I did start thinking about relationships on my run today. I took my Ipod, which I generally don't do, I like the quiet and random thoughts that pop into my head when I'm out on the road. But today I had to do 30 straight minutes and that hasn't happened since before I got pregnant, so I figured I needed a distraction. There's always a band you associate with certain people, and my ipod went to Death Cab for Cutie. Not a band I'm crazy about anymore, but it reminded me of the guy I dated before I met Ben. It was a fairly overdramatic relationship, but he's a good guy, and he got me out of a very deep rut that I'd dug for myself. Even though things didn't work out, he got me to think about what I wanted out of my life. I think up to that point I'd been bending over backwards to fit into other people's lives. Yeah, it ended badly, but we're sort of friends now. Again, still not a big Death Cab fan.
But before I get angry emails, I'm not saying they're terrible. I'm just saying that if you're sitting in the dark, listening to Transatlanticism over and over again because you feel like it's applicable to you, then it's time to evaluate your life and look at other options. Same goes for Tori Amos or Morrissey.
After that Drive-by Truckers came on, and it made me smile because that's a band that is forever linked to Ben for me. And I thought about how lucky I was that my life, and the people in it, had led me here. I once read a short story where the main character says something to the effect of "You could spend your life in abject terror, thinking of all the things that might not have happened." So when I think of that particular ex (who I'd rather call my friend than my ex at this point) I'm glad for the experience, because it helped me see what was important to me. And I know he's doing what he wants, where he wants to be, and I hope he's happy. It's an amazing thing, gaining some perspective.
Now all my other exes, including the one who passed out in the middle of a Subway robbery and the one who inserted himself into movie plots and then pretended those things really happened to HIM....yeah, I don't really care where the hell they ended up.
I will say that I thank whatever's out there, deity-wise, that my life went the way it did, because it got me to Ben, and eventually, to my beautiful son. I love you guys more than anything. Happy Valentine's Day.
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